Back to Top

I write on-going stories, one-shots (fluff and smut) and whatever else gets created from my lovely imagination and feelz :)

Kai, Yongguk and Leo are my muses <3 *swats Kris's hands away*

(Source: chanlucinations)

mousechanblogger asked: Mr. Kirin is it too big of expectations if you can already imagine your book up on the big screen? Even if you only have two chapters written but you have it all mapped out in your head? { ya can post publicly :) }


Hello there, writerly friend~ ★

I have been waiting for this question for a long time. So much, actually, that I know exactly what I am going to tell you. But, before we get there… I have a bit of a story to share.

Back before I began writing full-time, I used to work at this laboratory of sorts, doing work for this big evil company. I worked a lot there, I am talking 60-hour weeks. It nearly killed my writing. I spent so much time and energy working at this place where I was undervalued and underpaid. It was… a dark time. Full of uncertainty and hopelessness.

The only saving grace was that I often got to work alone. I could put on music, or Pandora, and listen to something other than the machinery. It was during this time that I picked up my love for audiobooks.

One day I was listening to comedians Pandora, continuing my eternal search for comedians that didn’t make misogynistic jokes, and — just like that — I stumbled upon a bit by Mike Birbiglia.

I was unable to find a clip of it, but I know for a fact that it is Track 5 of Sleepwalk With Me - Live.

During this bit, Mike talks about his first experience doing stand up. Basically, he lied to get himself the job— and when he get’s on stage he is so nervous that he reads his 11 minutes of material in less than 3 minutes. He runs home. Doesn’t even take the pay. And later that night he’s telling his girlfriend about how ‘great' the gig was. He then talks about how he knew the gig had been a disaster— but he kept telling himself that he needed to be a little delusional, because the alternative was to never do stand up again and let go of his dreams.

I don’t like all of his material. I think he’s a problematic character. But that line stuck with me— it resonated with me as I continued to do that awful 10-hours a day, 1-hour commute in-and-out, get-up-at-5-AM, no-you-can’t-ask-for-a-raise, piece-of-shit job I had.

There is no sure-cure to depression. Hell, there is no cure to life stepping on you and keeping you pinned to the ground— but I can tell you how I got better.

I allowed myself to be a little delusional. Or, as I like to call it— I let myself dream. I would imagine myself doing TV interviews. I would imagine myself doing Q&A’s at conventions. I would imagine my stories as movies, TV Shows, comic books— everything.

And it helped, because I paired my hope with my courage. I kept writing, and I kept building this blog— all while telling myself "things are going to work out, I know it."

People will tell you that you 'shouldn't get your hopes up' but I disagree. They might as well be telling you to not dream. There is so much negativity and hopelessness in the world as it is — with things you have no control over — and yet people have the gall to look you in the eyes and tell you to not dream. Not to inspire yourself. Not to fuel your heart.

Sure, I get it. Dreaming alone won’t make things happen— and I know that firsthand, but dreaming helps. Hope is the fuel of change. It is the material dreams are made of. And I will say this now— because I need to say it. If you disagree with what I have said, consider this:

Despair has never achieved anything, and it never will.

To answer your question: No, there is nothing wrong with being a little delusional~ c;

Dream, writerly friend. Dream. Imagine your stories, and your art, out in the world touching the hearts of countless— but do not expect the universe to bring these to you. Pair your hope with your courage, and you will make your dreams a reality~ ♥︎

Please spread this around. God, I hate when everyone crushes their dreams with reality. They can work in conjunction!

Anonymous asked: could i request a really cute/awkward first date with Kris or Kai or Chen? ( you can pick whomever)

I’m just finishing up what was sent yesterday

since I did Kai and Chen already I guess I’ll do kris *sigh*

You stood at the entrance of a fancy restaurant, feeling completely out of place and you hadn’t even stepped in yet. You tugged at your dress, still not used to not wearing pants. You took a deep breath and went in.

The maître d looked down his nose at you, “Can I help you?”

"Um, there should he a reservation for two under Kris?"

He didn’t even bother to glance down at his book. “There is no Kris here, mademoiselle.”

You twisted your fingers, desperate for an answer, “I…”

There was an abrupt squealing of shoes on polished floor and Kris walked around the corner, seemingly smooth. “Oh you’re here?” He sent you a confident smile.

The maître d glared at you but let you go with your date. You didn’t feel better now that Kris was here, however. His hair was artfully swept back and he was dressed in a black suit tailor to his lanky body. He was apologizing for putting the reservation under his full name but all that was running through in your head was “Please can I not fuck up this night.”

"Hey, are you okay?" Kris placed a large hand on your shoulder, peering down at you in worry.

"I’ve never been in such a nice place," You let on, staring at the chandelier in the distance, that probably cost more than your house.

"Me too," Kris agreed, echoing your awe. He shook his head, "I mean, I’ve never been here before. I’ve been to plenty of fancy restaurants. And places. You know…"

Kris pulled out a chair for you and pushed you in. Except he pushed way too much, making you gasp. He yanked the chair backwards, making you land on your butt. If only you could melt into the floor. This was already a disaster.

You tried ordering in french but the waiter simply dismissed your stuttering. What you wound up with was a bare salad that you wound up just pushing around with your fork. You daintily took a sip of your water, not sure how to with the lemon perched on one side of your glass and manage to spill even that all into your lap.

You sent a look to Kris, wondering if he was looking at you in disgust and when he was going to tell you he’d call you or code word for “we are so not having another date”.

Except Kris wasn’t doing so well himself. He was cutting his steak with a butter knife, which was practically impossible. Then once he finally managed to cut a piece he grimaced at the blood leaking out. Obviously he hadn’t understood what rare meant. You watched him sigh and his wide shoulders droop.

"You probably don’t want another date with me, huh?" Kris asked glumly.

"What?!" You said, shocked Kris was saying words you had been thinking about him only vice versa. "I was thinking you would never want to dare a girl that spills water all over herself."

Kris, instead of the cool and poised act he had been putting on before, smiled at you in embarrassment “I wanted to impress you but seems like I just managed to make a fool of myself.”

You felt the apprehension leak away from your body. If Kris was feeling the same way as you then— “Why don’t we get out of here and go to mcdonalds. I’m dying for a Big Mac.” You reached across the table and grabbed his hands in excitement.

"Really?!" Kris’s eyes widened and he glanced down at your hands over his. You watched a blush climb up his face but he kept his face in check, "Yeah I could go for some meat that’s been cooked."

So the two ended up in McDonald’s, in your fancy clothes, laughing and throwing french fries at each other. The cherry on top was when Kris tossed you into the pool of colourful balls, throwing himself in after you. There he gave you your first kiss, which you cherished forever.

14 hours ago / 5 notes

Anonymous asked: Jin of BTS and you get into and argument and it leads to fluff and makeup sex pretty please?

I’m just finishing up what was sent yesterday

You knew Jin was mad. It wasn’t because he was yelling at you or saying snide remarks. It was because he was silent and that’s when you knew he was fuming. No amount of joking or casual conversation could push him out of his mood. To top it all off, he was mad at you.

"Jin, please," You begged. You sat on his lap and snaked an arm around his shoulder, "You can’t stay angry at me forever."

Jin just looked at you with a gaze that spoke all the words he refused to say. Your spine stayed rigid for a few seconds until you let go of your pride. “I’m sorry I didn’t remember our anniversary and made it worse by playing with Jhope all day.”

"Do you even know all the preparing I did? All the planning and paying for the hall and convincing everyone to be there on time and—" You hushed Jin’s rant with a kiss to his nose. He blinked several times, not sure how to act.

You walked you fingers along Jin’s chest, swirling in between his collarbones, “Why don’t I,” You paused to kiss him right by his ear which you knew was his secret turn on switch, “make it up to you?” You sent him an impish look and all sense of reason was thrown out the window.

You had intended to give Jin your full attention but both of your lust got to you. You rode him facing him, slowly going up and down his length. Your shirt was pulled down so his hands had ample access to your breasts while you bounced on him. Every once in a while Jin’s eyebrows would furrow as his climax over took him. You had enough of him biting his lips though and pulled his body close to his so you could nibble on those plush pillows yourself.

Jin’s climax was building. You could tell by the way his voice was getting higher. It was almost on par with his higher notes. That and the fact that he had begun to buck his hips and his fingers were dug into your upper arms which were braced on either side of his head against the couch back. Abruptly, Jin took control, hands holding you firmly to his body so he could switch positions and pound into you at his own pace.

Once he came, thrusts now a little shaky, you mewled your own content state. “Am I forgiven now?” You wondered, Jin’s face hidden from you now, tucked into the crook of your neck.

Jin didn’t even bother to raise his head, his reply muffled against your skin. “Not even close.”

You grinned because that only meant more fun for you.

16 hours ago / 1 note

To the last anon omfg my phone didn’t show the rest of your message. If I had known you were req jongin I would have written it :c sorry love

18 hours ago / 0 notes

Anonymous asked: are you still doing the requests? >< can i have fluffy jongin trying to teach you to play pool and sneaking kisses? /bows feel better ♡♥♡

Nope it was just for yesterday. I’m just finishing up what came in

19 hours ago / 0 notes

Anonymous asked: Can you do daddy kai with biting and scratching and spanking that ends in fluff please

Because writing when I’m stressed gives me an escape route. Send me your req for Aug.18

This was pure torture. You had really messed up and Daddy was punishing you without holding back. You were stripped of all your clothes the minute you got home. You were ordered to lie back on the silk sheets of the bed, while Kai discarded his nice clothes. All that glorious skin and none of it within your reach, you thought to yourself.

“You, Princess, were allowing Kris’s hands way too high on your thigh,” Kai tsked your disobedience.

Read More

Anonymous asked: Chanyeol request? College au! Ends up asking you on a date??

Because writing when I’m stressed gives me an escape route. Send me your req for Aug.18

“So wait, you’re saying that because that baby was never held as a child, that’s why it was more likely to lash out at other’s who received love from its parents in jealousy?” The brunette was a loud one, that’s for sure.

Read More

Anonymous asked: Hey, hope you're doing okay, and are able to overcome your stress!! :) Requesting a smutty one-shot with Chen please?! Maybe like a in a school? Idk, whatever you want!

Because writing when I’m stressed gives me an escape route. Send me your req for Aug.18

You leaned over the balcony of the theatre, the headmaster having just finished his beginning of the year speech. You felt glum because everyone knew the school they just had to get into, everyone knew what their masters was going to be in; everyone accept you.

“Have I ever told you that you have got to be the most gorgeous girl in our class?” Chen opened with, leaning back on the balcony with you.

Read More

twotwozerofive asked: sehun, mafia, fluff! hope you'll feel better soon x

Because writing when I’m stressed gives me an escape route. Send me your req for Aug.18

I’m not sure if this is what you were looking for but I pulled from my mafia story. the idea grew from your req and I had fun writing it hehe

"I don’t understand why no one invited me to go to Chile. I know so much about that place, it’s unreal," Sehun sulked.

"You I understand. You’re a cyber geek. What’s that going to get us? But me?" Kai smoothed back his hair, "I could have easily gotten so much money from the ladies vacationing there not to mention add onto my list of races I’ve f-"

"What the hell are you two doing?" Chanyeol barged in on Kai and Sehun. The two youngest were lounging by the drop-off pool, the closest they could get to Chile.

"What did you do to not go on the trip?" Sehun flicked an errant drop of water from his long fingertips.

Read More

Anonymous asked: I just notice you follow lots of pretty gals


All girls are pretty!~  ^^

Pffft Daniel you sure know how to butter us up don’t you

undercover-porn-unicorn asked: Would you do a Taemin request? If not just change it to someone you'd prefer. But where he comes home with blond hair while you're baking cookies and you didn't know he was going to be dying his hair.

Because writing when I’m stressed gives me an escape route. Send me your req for Aug.18

You rubbed your back as you crouched before your oven. You’d be salivating like a dog right now if you weren’t so fixated on pulling the cookies out on perfect timing. They should be ready for when—

"I’m back!" Taemin shouted and you heard the door close softly behind him.

"I’m in the kitchen," You called out.

"You should have seen the rush down at the farmers market," Taemin recanted his trip to you, "Some crazy guy was trying to sell rap verses by the dollar."

Read More

Authornim is feeling really fucking stressed today so maybe send me some requests and help me distract myself :c

1 day ago / 0 notes


theboyswhomwelove dude this reminds me of the trophy no joke

Shut up. I saw that and screamed bloody murder

(Source: starclusterdiary)

sassy jongup

(Source: bangyongguks)